Category: California

It’s happening. Less than twenty four hours until I bid adieu to the community I’ve called home for nine years. Hayes and the girls departed last Sunday and I stuck around to catch up on some appointments and connect with a few people. In that time, our president has vulgarly condoned white supremacy, another local high schooler has committed suicide, and I have heard friends stress about the scheduling Tetris that is the reality of privileged Palo Alto parents. 

Finally, I can answer the question, “What are you looking forward to?” I am looking forward to less. Less hatred, less stuff, less to do, less tension, less pressure, and fewer distraction.

Yet still I will miss this place and it’s people. Friends, please hold our children tight. We’ll be back in one rotation around the sun.

From Friday to Tuesday I went to a Stanford soccer camp. There were a range of kids from nine to fifteen. The team names were based on countries, and I was in Mexico. We lost the first game, tied the second, and we won the last two. After the four games, Mexico got there’s place in the tournament, (there were a lot of teams. Like ten or something.) On Monday, we did a skit night with all of the teams including the older girls teams. Over all I had a great soccer camp.

Pro: You could have a very good time running up and down the hills with your sister.

Con: Then you might get a cramp in your side and a pain in your left knee.
Pro: You get to spend time with your family.

Con: However you have to do that while swatting away bugs and wasps.

Pro: When you sprint down and up three hills you’re parents are very proud of you and may even suggest that you try out for cross-country.

Con: That statement doesn’t make you feel as good as it seems when you don’t want to do cross-country and just ran because you were being bombarded by bugs. (Have I mentioned that the bugs there particularly like me.)

Pro: You feel very good if you get a mile ahead of your parents.

Con: But then you don’t get so hyped if they catch up.

Pro: You may discover a secret shortcut.

Con: You may also find that it’s covered in pricks and that your sister doesn’t want to go, so you are forced not to discover the unknown.

Pro: You get to see many animals such as deer and wild turkeys.

Con: Have I mentioned that Mama turkeys don’t like people to mess with their babies.

Pro: You can share this experience with your friends.

Con: Well there really is no con for that.

We picked a travel agent yesterday. I guess sometimes DIY is not the best plan. I guess the truth is that Rachel and I love to go on trips, but our favorite ones were planned by friends. We just don’t love planning them. So we found Sam. She’s done this before. A few times. Different every time. And people liked her. Hopefully, we will too. 

We still have to decide whether to travel east or west. Rachel leans towards a soft start in Australia. I’ve got to say, that sounds pleasant and easy. There’s something to that. So maybe that’s our new plan.

So many decisions to make. I spent days planning Iceland, and it seems we may just cancel it all. Sigh. I have “Northwest vacation” on my calendar dar every day now but I’m here at home thinking of the future. The death ride is in 6 days and I have not ridden in 5. I have to get off my bum and get in shape! At least I dressed for it. Just gotta get out of here and do some riding now. 

At least last night was fun. Impromptu trip to see a soccer game. Galaxy played the earthquakes at the Stanford stadium and quakes won it in the 94th minute, which was amazing. Tess and Tricia came to sit with us for a while. We went with Mark and Sonia and kids. They sat near us, not too close. But close enough to all feel a part of the crazy cheering fan section next to us that never stopped hooting and dancing for the entire game. 

A nice cherry on top was the never ending fireworks show after the game. It even topped the halftime show, which was pretty cool. A couple pictures to jog the memory…

Today I trecked through an endless dessert full of taking about one thousand pictures out of books just so we wouldn’t have to carry the copies of the paperback ones. The rest of the day i just relaxed and played on my phone.

After trying on almost too many backpacks I came up with a writing piece of how I spent most of my day.

“Come on Anika, the store opens in thirty minutes,”  I hear my mom call.

“Okay, I’m coming,” I assure her.  After sitting down on the scorching hot  seat, I think otherwise.  But my mom was already backing out of the drive way, so I had no choice.

Ten minutes later, we’re pulling up in front of REI. Without hesitation, I slip out of the car, and sprint to the front doors. In one motion,  I pull open the front doors – or I imagine to at least. In reality, I just keep pulling, and pulling until I finally surrender and ask my mom, “What time is it?”

“10:45,” she replies. I groan, and wait in the 104 degree heat for fifteen more minutes. At 11:00 I push open the double doors I am overcome by relief. Cool air conditioning blows into my face, and I stroll right up to the air vent and stick my face in front of it.

A minute or two pass, and a kind man brings my mom and I to the back packs.

After trying on, looking through, and weighing down what seemed like a hundred back packs I finally decided on a big teal one. I ran it up and down the stairs, fit it to my back, and finally put it down. My back aching like crazy, I non regretfully put the backpack back in the cart. With an assortment of toiletry kits, money pouches, and other trinkets laying alongside my back pack, I leave the store, not planing to come back any time soon.

Here I sit in my warm, cozy home where the wood framing around the floor to ceiling windows appears to have been hand cut by Eichler’s crew in the early 1950s. Eichler intended to create diverse and inclusive dwellings for middle-class people. Now this land is populated mostly by technologists, venture capitalists, and academics, people with exceptional educations and above average incomes. In many ways, this community is like Lake Wobegon from Prairie Home Companion. “All the women are strong, all the men are good looking, and all the children are above average.” It is like living in Pleasantville where the weather is 70 degrees year round, and so many people are fair-minded, hard working, and family-focused. There are some downsides to this town. The amount of success, intensity and drive can be overbearing. Some drive too fast, become self-focused and pressure themselves to achieve unhealthy levels of achievement. For the most part though, my family of four enjoys many of the benefits of the area and hasn’t had many direct confrontations with the negatives.

For this reason, I wonder why we are planning to bid ado to our sweet life and traverse the planet for a year. I think credit can partially be given to Cristina Spencer and James Currier, two wonderful friends who think big and feel deeply. Several weeks ago, Hayes and I were at Cristina’s house sipping her husband’s spectacular mixed drinks when Cristina told Hayes about her recently aborted plan to travel the world with her family for a year. I could tell that Hayes was engaged in their conversation but I was busy lamenting the confusing and disgraceful political drama of the day with Tim, Irene and Graham.

A week later in the midst of soccer tournaments, visiting cousins, and last days of school, James Currier joined Hayes for tea on a weekend afternoon. Hayes explained to him that while he liked all of his colleagues and was engaged with his work, a part of him felt discontented. James asked him what he cared most about. Without missing a beat, Hayes explained that his family was what mattered most to him. Our girls, 10 and 12, would soon be adolescents and he felt like our most impactful time with them was slipping away. James, not one to mince words, suggested that Hayes take a year and focus on family.

At this point, I returned home to the 12 year old and her cousin making chocolate guacamole, fudgsicles, and fruit roll ups and the guys asked me what I thought about traveling the world for a year. “The hundred days of May” when a mom of elementary school age children is challenged with fitting 100 days worth of activities into thirty is a “special period”. My basic MO is to say yes whenever possible, so… I said, “Sure,” thinking it may be a passing dream that could add some joy to the afternoon and eventually dissipate. I should know better. Hayes is a man who can turn an idea into action in a nanosecond, and this was not the first time that James had suggested an idea that significantly changed the direction of our family life.

Years earlier, James and his fabulous wife, Trina, had invited us and several other families to Costa Rica with their family. I thanked them and declined, saying that we tended to be frugal with our travel plans. He then told Hayes and me about a friend of his who spent three months traveling with her family and returned home to discover that she had cancer and a short life expectancy. He reported that the family had been so grateful to have had that intensive time together. The combination of the story and the storytelling had an enormous impact on Hayes and me. We joined the jubilant 2010 “Verde Como Lechuga” trip and have traveled several times a year ever since.

Looking forward to getting to know you a bit better, big wide world out there.

A few people asked me why we’re going on this trip. Well, here are my main goals:

1. Be with my family, and get to know them better
2. Slower and deeper lifestyle. bonding. learning
3. Visit friends
4. get our of our bubble. get some context of our place in the world
5. stay health and safe